Up In Flames
by Kare Uta
Summary: She had no idea which one of them had been killed that day; she had no idea which soul, which life had gone up in flames with that body that she didn't know of either. Oneshot.


**Up In Flames**

The night was sticky and warm, almost sickly warm. Nonetheless, Kohaku had managed to sleep soundly and was snoring so much that it was any wonder how he hadn't woken the dead yet. Lucille had tossed and turned for hours and had put his hair up in about a hundred different ways until he could keep it from sticking to his face, neck and back. Gwin's large form struggled as usual to find somewhere to sleep along the floor; somehow he was always kicking or touching something, and it bothered him!

At some point in the night Gwin had resigned himself to the fact that he wouldn't be sleeping well that night and eventually sat up against the wall and began playing with Hedgie. Suddenly, Gwin was thankful that the animal was nocturnal.

Soft moans and heavy breaths could be heard from the other side of the seat, and after a few more quiet grumbles, Gwin got curious about what was happening that he couldn't see. He peaked over a bit nervously, and found Eles curled onto her stomach, her quiet cries and mewls muffled as she buried her mouth into her pillow.

"Eles…" He called out to her gently. Was she having a nightmare?

Her small body shuddered at the sound and the sobbing was muffled further the deeper into the material she went. He stood up promptly, leaning over the seat and reaching to touch her; the clothing that stuck to her back was cold and damp, and her shaking only increased when he touched her. He shook her by her shoulder gently, "Eles," he continued to call, "you need to wake up, Eles."

"Eles," she repeated after him, still sobbing, with her long fingers sinking into the pillow, "wake up! Please!"

So she was having a nightmare, or she was delusional, and he didn't like the idea of either one at this point. He struggled to roll her onto her back, finding her sobbing into her hands, her features drenched with sweat and tears.

He picked up his hat from the ground, though he was tempted to use the violin instead, and tossed it onto Kohaku, waking him promptly. "What the hell?" When he glanced over to where Gwin was concentrating, he saw Eles and his entire face fell. "What's wrong with her?"

"I'm not sure."

Kohaku jumped in between the seats, sitting down beside her and pinning her legs down, keeping her from kicking him. Gwin had gotten a canteen of water, pouring it out on a cloth before putting it to her head. He had only turned away for just a moment, about to try to wake Lucille for his help when a scream shot out behind him, doing the job for him.

Kohaku held onto the girl, keeping her in place, disallowing her from hitting herself, or any of them in the process of her abrupt waking.

Eles' eyes were open wide and she grabbed onto the hands that were holding her, trying to pull them away while staring at their owner, though she still couldn't seem to comprehend who or what she was looking at.

"Eles," Lucille's voice was softest of all, but it took a few times before the girl looked over, "darling, what's the matter?"

The girl stood on the seat with shaky legs and climbed over, running past them and out of the car, tripping in the dirt. Gwin followed her out, placing a jacket over her shoulders to keep her damp body from being exposed to any cold. "What were you dreaming about?"

She remained quiet and covered her mouth with both her hands, nervously running her fingers through a series of steps.

Lucille tapped Gwin's shoulder lightly, and reminded him of what he had to do.

"You're going to catch a cold," he picked her up promptly, much to the little sounds of discomfort that she made, and took her back into the car, "clean yourself up and change."

Kohaku and Lucille had redressed and jumped out, leaving her alone. When Gwin joined them they couldn't keep their silence for much longer. "What the hell was _that_?"

"A night terror, perhaps."

Lucille was covered in worry, looking to the car door continuously, "And what caused it?"

"Something is on her mind perhaps? This heat wave doesn't help either."

"Perhaps."

"Come on! No matter how hot it is you don't react like _that_!" Kohaku dismissed almost furiously.

"What are you yelling at me for?" Gwin snapped. "I'm saying what I know!"

Lucille turned to the larger man, curious, "Have you ever seen anything like this, Gwin?"

"Only in a four year old." He left it at that, and left Lucille to understand what he meant.

The blond nodded gently and then went to knock on the car door, pulling it open and peeking inside. He released a quick cloud of white breath, getting into the car and pulling the tired girl against him. Drenching the cloth in some water, he wiped her back which she hadn't reached, watching her fumble with a piece of damp material to hide her bare front.

Lucille debated with himself for a bit, but knew that with the girl in this almost catatonic state, he wouldn't be able to get her to cooperate very much. He picked up one of Kohaku's clean shirts, buttoning it up before putting it on over the girl's head, leaving her in the oversized material as though it was a nightgown.

The girl was shaking, tears occasionally dropped from her eyes and, possibly without her even realizing, she began to nestle into Lucille's chest, even if she still felt warm.

Gwin peeked inside, "How is everything?"

"Is that my shirt?" Kohaku grumbled.

"She's too warm." Lucille told them. "She can't keep having things sticking to her." He continued to justify taking Kohaku's shirt. He patted her back lightly, silencing her cries. "Hopefully she'll feel better once the heat is gone."

Gwin cleared the seats of excess blankets, "She should try to sleep again."

Lucille looked down at the girl, lifting her chin slightly to look up, "Will you be okay sleeping again, Eles?" Her fingers reflexively gripped onto his arm; it was an answer in itself, even when he thought she wasn't listening.

"As if she'd want to sleep after that!" Kohaku bit out promptly. "Hell! I barely want to."

"What were you dreaming about, Eles?"

"Don't…" She shook her head and wiped at her eyes, sitting up. "I'll go to sleep." She murmured it; she didn't want to do it, but it seemed like doing so would keep them from asking more questions. She crawled over the backseat, laying down on her makeshift bed.

"Eles…"

She cringed slightly, then buried her rosy cheek into the pillow.

That night they all slept a little uneasily, unable to put what they had seen out of their minds. Not even Kohaku, one who could put just about everything out of his mind for a good night's sleep, could stop thinking about it.

In the morning they found the car doors open, and the girl sat on a rock not too far away, twirling a piece of ribbon on her clothing as she stared at the sky. "Your eyes are red." Lucille noted out loud, extending his arm, "Are you still warm?"

"I feel fine." The girl replied promptly, defiantly.

The following night, in the same sickly sticky heat, she reacted the same way in her sleep; mumbling incoherently, thrashing about, crying uncontrollably. Kohaku jumped out of the car; walking away and leaving Gwin and Lucille to tend to the girl by themselves.

It couldn't be ignored for much longer; although it wasn't being ignored to begin with. Rather, they were just trying to keep silent about it. Kohaku couldn't bring himself to be the one to talk to her about it, but he was livid that the others were the same way, and they hadn't asked her about it again that night.

The fact that Eles' fingers repeatedly slipped along the keys of her piano, that she couldn't concentrate, that she hadn't hummed a melody in days…it all unnerved Lucille; almost chilling him to the bone at the thought that the only person that had any real hope for any of them had given it up for something none of them could understand.

"Hey, Eles," Lucille dropped himself beside her, "before we start moving again…we should talk about these nightmares."

"We don't need to."

"Yes we do." Gwin's rough voice seemed to intimidate her, at least momentarily.

"Well…I don't want to!"

"We only want to help, Eles."

"Stop talking!" The girl covered her ears, shaking her head. "You can't even understand!"

"You're right, we can't! Not unless you help us."

"You don't need to know!"

Gwin placed his hand against Lucille's mouth, aggravating the blond, but it was going to be the only way Gwin could say anything. "Why don't we need to know?"

"Because I know…" She gritted her teeth together; she could feel herself beginning to burn up bit by bit again. "I know what he'll tell me!"

Lucille fought off Gwin's hand, glaring up at him momentarily before turning to her, "What _I'll_ tell you? What will I tell you?"

"The same thing you said that day…" Eles hid her face between her chest and knees. "Between us…I don't know who…I don't know who died…I don't…I don't know who I killed! I don't know who I burnt! Even…even like that I know that it's my entire fault!"

"Hey…"

"Even…if he was dead already…Even if I had killed him already…I… He told me _'Eles, you have to burn Celes!'_ so…I did so…does…does it…"

_Of course it's __that… _

"So…which is it? I know that…I killed…" She gasped for breath, extending her neck as she tried to breath deeply. "I don't know who…"

They wanted to call her…Snap her out of it…But…they were aware…They were painfully aware that with what she was telling them she was putting them into a dilemma of their own.

"I…reduced that body to ashes and…I don't know whose it was! I…can't even look in the mirror to know the answer!" She stood up quickly, and her legs shook beneath the weight that her young shoulders were burdened with, "So don't tell me…That I can free myself! Don't tell me because…I can't!"

"Hey…"

"You can't… If…you tell me that… I remind myself of what you said every day, okay? I…do it a lot! I promise!"

"I believe you." Lucille breathed out softly.

"My dreams… I'm seeing a body burning and I'm feeling it too so…how can I know? Don't tell me anything else… I know that this…is punishment and…I deserve it! So don't say anything…Don't ask me anything…" Her voice was hoarse, she was running out of breath. She was so upset. "I know it's my punishment and…I'll take it so please don't worry about me!"

She wiped at her teary eyes and ran away, stumbling into the dirt before picking herself back up and going back to the car.

Lucille followed her with his eyes, and noted Kohaku sitting in one of the trees, looking down at a spot on the ground with something akin to pain in his eyes. "Kohaku…"

The man dropped himself out of the tree, landing perfectly on his feet.

"Is this really what we're fighting for?"

"What happened to her…"

"We're really not making her situation better!" Kohaku snapped. "Drag _me_ around! Drag _Gwindel_ around! But what did she do to be put through this? If you know too that this wasn't her fault, prove it to her and stop dragging her around like she's a criminal!"

"With us is the best place for her."

Kohaku half smiled; a smile of contempt. "I hate that you think you know everything!"

Gwindel held Kohaku back with one arm, knowing that Kohaku was just seconds from launching himself at Lucille. "Calm down."

Lucille stood up, just out of Kohaku's reach, "To hear what she said and knowing she's been holding these things to herself for a while now…it hurts like hell, Kohaku, but I'm still confident that the best place for her is with us." He gripped Kohaku's shoulder supportively, placing a smile on his face before he walked back to the car.

Gwin finally let go of the other man, heaving a sigh, "I find myself agreeing with him."

"If she wasn't with us she wouldn't have to think about this; she could move on with her life and take on whatever identity she wants!"

"She can do that with us also if she feels she needs to."

"We remind her of everything every day; how can she ever forget?"

"Perhaps she's not meant to forget, Kohaku."

Lucille tended to the girl's grazed knee, occasionally looking up at her; though she avoided all eye contact by staring out the window. "You're a little red; drink some water."

"I feel okay."

"I think when this heat wave passes you'll feel better; the night terrors won't bother you as much."

"Maybe."

"If you want…to be Celes, if you want to go back to being Celes, you can do that, and that doesn't mean you'll be hurting your brother, it doesn't mean you'll be disrespecting his memory."

"I know…" She whispered hoarsely.

"We're not going to stop you; whenever you want…"

"Okay…"

"I think Kohaku believed it'll be best if you stop travelling with us…"

She snapped her head in Lucille's direction, "Do you believe that?"

"I think that sometimes Kohaku might be right."

"I don't have anyone else, Lucille," she pointed out, tears stinging her eyes. "I don't want to be left behind."

"So stay with us." Kohaku groaned loudly, jumping onto the seat. "What else can I possibly say?"

The singer smiled gently, "I'm sorry for what I said that day… I'm sorry, and I'm not sorry at the same time! I'm not sorry because it snapped you out of it then; I'm sorry that I didn't realize that it made things worse now."

"It's not your fault."

Kohaku nudged her, a pissed off look on his face, "Don't you think you let him off too easily?"

"It really isn't his fault."

"I hope you'll stay with us for as long as possible…" Lucille told her, lifting her face so that she'd look at him.

"That's because you're selfish."

Eles smiled a bit, nudging Kohaku, "Don't you want me around?" she asked.

"Do what you want." His cheeks had brightened to a light red, answering differently. They all realized that it made a big difference to him.

"I'm sure if you keep him in your heart at the same time, you'll make your brother very happy no matter what you decide to do."

"You really believe so?"

Lucille grinned, petting her dark hair, "Of course."

That evening when they stopped again, a new and uninviting city not too far away, Eles sat at the crystal piano. Her hands shook; a mixture of anticipation and fear swelling from her chest to her finger tips. She attempted to turn those feelings into determination, running her fingers slowly and steadily over the keys. At the bad sound that came out, she flexed her fingers as they were almost unused to it. Untrained… Similar to how her brothers were…

She pressed her left hand firmly on the back panel, playing a soft melody with her right hand and concentrating hard. If she hadn't supported her head with her arm, straining her muscles, she would've felt herself doze off completely at the sound.

Looking around, everyone seemed to have been lulled to sleep by the atmosphere she had provided, also having kept them up enough for the past few nights. She felt her shoulders shaking. What had she done? She shielded her head, dropping herself onto the keys. She heard a thud against the back wall. She stood up rapidly, almost falling over her chair as she looked around. She fell right into a pair of arms.

Kohaku stood above her, holding her in place. She looked around; noting a small box had fallen off a suitcase beside her. She continued to shake with fear, "What's wrong with me?"

He knew that whatever he said, she wouldn't feel any better. He placed her on the back seat, sitting beside her.

She curled her legs under a blanket, staring away, "My brother would be mad at me if I can't play anymore."

"You can't play if you're forcing yourself to do it."

"But if I…"

"You used to play because you loved it, you used to play because your brother wanted you to… You can still do that, but first you need to rest."

"Rest? What does it have to do with anything?"

"You're too tired."

"I am not!"

Kohaku chucked a pillow at her, "Don't make me knock you out myself."

With a sigh, Eles lay herself down on the back seat, cuddling her pillow and tucking it under her chin. "Are you going to sleep?"

"Soon."

She remained quiet for a bit longer, watching him as he stared out the car window at their surroundings. "You don't need to stay awake for me, Kohaku."

"You're so full of yourself." He accused bitingly.

She sat up, still clinging onto the pillow, "Are you worried, Kohaku?" She hadn't intended to upset him, or to make him feel ashamed… Rather, she wondered if he felt the same way. The look on his face was enough to give her an answer; she had seen that look before, in her own mirror. She crawled over and curled up in his side under his arm, "I'm worried too."

Kohaku continued to stare out the window for a little longer. He glanced down at the girl, nestled closely, he petted her reddish-brown hair gently as she breathed softly, in and out very quietly.

"Kohaku…"

Was she dreaming again? Was she awake? Just in case, he stilled the movement of his hand on her head.

"Are you uncomfortable, Kohaku?"

"No, El…" He stopped himself before he could say the whole name but cringed inwardly.

"Its okay, Kohaku." She murmured, looking up at him with wide sparkling eyes. "You can still call me Eles."

"Is that really what you want?"

"What I want…" She hugged the pillow tightly. "I'm never going to get him back so… I'll be okay if you call me by his name."

"If you say so."

"Sleep now?"

"Sleep." He agreed quietly, nodding and slipping himself to lie back, holding her in place.

That night, tears still streamed from her face in her sleep, though she wasn't convulsing, she wasn't sobbing, she wasn't in pain; she smiled somewhat, although it was a sad sight as the salty tears slipped down, providing moisture to her chapped lips.

The three of them were at war with something larger than them, and had only simply assumed that the child was just like them. But she had it worse than all of them. She was at war with herself every single day. She had hid it, so well, and for so long.

At the very least, they prayed, that if there was no solution to her problems in waking, that she would have all the answers, and have the chance to see her twin brother, in the safety of her sleep.

Just for a little while… That was all they could hope for.

The one thing that they had hoped hadn't gone up in flames with either one of them, withered away, was the hope that the children had held.

That night, the first cold breeze in days passed; signifying the end of a long and painful wave of heat.

**A/N: 4am and it's finally done~ I…have no words for this one but I really put a lot of hard work into it! **

**If you've read this, please leave a review and let me know what you think. I'd appreciate it! **


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